The Good Ones Page 31
Watching her stand in the room he had built for her, in her pretty dress with her dark eyes sparkling behind her glasses, made his heart swell and ache at the same time. In two weeks, he’d be gone and he wouldn’t see her every day anymore. He wouldn’t hear her say I love you. Despite their being at odds last night, the thought was almost unbearable.
How had she come to mean so much to him? He’d been involved before. Heck, he’d been married and had a child with Whitney, but he’d never felt this way about his ex. The thought made him feel as if he’d done a disservice to them both by insisting on marriage. They had tried for Perry’s sake, but there was no question that they had never suited each other.
But this tiny woman, who had made him laugh the very first moment he met her, she had managed to capture his heart. Ryder didn’t share his feelings; he didn’t talk about emotions. But during their time together, he’d told her about his father, about his brother, about becoming a dad. He’d let her in and Maisy had made it feel okay, like his feelings were safe in her delicate hands.
Ryder watched her examine every bit of the room. The hardwood floor, the window seats, the built-in bookshelves around the doorway. She spun around with her arms spread wide in the circular room, as if it had been made for spinning. The joy on her face made every single detail he had sweated totally worth it.
“Oh, Ryder.” She stopped spinning, dizzy on her feet, and lunged toward him. She went a little off course because of the spinning but that was okay because he got to pull her into his arms to steady her. She looped her arms around his neck and pulled him down so she could rest her forehead against his. “I know things are weird between us, because of Perry and the Royal Order of George, but I have to tell you, you’ve made my dream come true. Thank you.”
Ryder reached behind him and snapped out the light so that they weren’t illuminated to the outside world. Then he kissed her and held her and rocked her in a slow dance to music he hummed. He just wanted to hold her in his arms and make the moments where she was his last as long as he could.
Maisy seemed to understand. And when she let go of him and stepped back to slide out of her pretty dress, Ryder thought his heart would hammer right out of his chest. The full moon shining through the big windows gave him enough light to see her beautiful skin revealed inch by inch. When his gaze met hers, the sexy glitter in her eyes about undid him.
He shrugged out of his shirt and tossed it onto the ground. Then he scooped her close and swept her down on top of it. If this thing between them was ending, then he had two goals. One was to savor every inch of her and the other was to make replacing him with any other man as challenging as humanly possible. Perhaps it was selfish, but he’d rather have Maisy be a cat lady with King George while running a bookstore than have her hook up with a substitute guy. The mere thought gave him heartburn. If he could make this good enough, maybe he could convince her of how he felt and that distance didn’t matter. That what they had was worth crossing the miles between them.
He trailed his mouth down the curve of her neck. He felt her fingers bury themselves in his hair. He placed the softest kisses along her collarbone and down across the top of a breast where he paused to tease the nipple. Maisy let out a sigh that turned into a moan and he smiled against her skin. He moved to the other breast and was rewarded by her response as she arched against him. She wrapped her legs around his hips and drew him against her, cradling his arousal in her soft feminine hold. Ryder’s blood ran hot and thick. He wasn’t going to let her distract him from his purpose.
He put one hand in between them and spread his fingers across her midriff. He held her still with that one hand, pinned to his shirt on the floor, while he hooked her underwear with his other hand and drew it down her legs. Then he pushed her thighs apart and settled in.
“Ryder, I don’t—” she began but he interrupted by blowing softly on the curls between her legs. She gasped and he smiled. Then he kissed her there.
It was a bit of a tussle. She resisted the intimacy at first and he could feel her get tense and self-conscious.
“Shh,” he whispered against her skin. “Trust me.”
He felt her take a deep breath and force herself to relax. Excellent. He took his time, he savored, he tasted, he nipped, he licked, he suckled, he loved. When Maisy thrashed, lifted her hips, arched her back, and cried out his name on a moan of wonder, he felt a satisfaction he had never known before. He did that. He made her feel that. The only thing that was even close to this feeling was being inside of her.
He kneeled before her and unfastened his pants. Maisy reached up to help him, pushing his jeans down his thighs with her feet, but she was impatient and pulled him back down, guiding him with her hands right where she wanted him to be.
“Oh, sweetheart, the floor is hard—” he began but she interrupted him. She wrapped her legs around his waist and put her hands on his hips, then she pulled him in hard and tight. It was Ryder’s turn to moan. Then she pushed him out and he hissed a breath. She was hot and wet and felt so damn good. A couple more times and he had to grab her hands and hold them or he wasn’t going to last.
The laughter in her eyes when he kissed her told him that had been her plan all along. But Ryder wasn’t going to rush this. Oh, no, if he couldn’t convince her that what they had was special and worth keeping then he was going to savor every single second with her.
He rolled so that they were on their sides facing each other. He liked this. He liked the way she fit against him. Then he turned onto his back, so that she straddled him. The mere sight of Maisy, bare breasted and moving up and down on him, almost killed him. He clenched his teeth. He wanted to watch her—every expression that flitted across her face, every bounce of her perky breasts, he wanted etched on his memory forever. When he couldn’t stand it any longer, and he felt her begin to tighten about him, he rolled again so that she was under him, and he thrust into her so deeply he was sure they were joined for life.
It was too much. His poor body couldn’t help but respond. He felt the electricity coil out from his spine as he hit his peak, forcing Maisy into another one of her own. When their bodies relaxed after the passionate onslaught, Ryder rolled onto his back and brought her with him, so they were nestled together, staring up at the domed ceiling above them, breathing as if they’d just run for their lives.
There was so much Ryder wanted to ask, so much he wanted to say, but he didn’t know how. Judging by Maisy’s silence, she didn’t, either. Perhaps they weren’t able to find the words right now, but this, this loving that they shared, was the purest communication Ryder could manage. This woman had him heart, soul, mind, and body, and leaving her was going to kill him.
Chapter Thirty-two
IT was the meeting of the Royal Order of George that made all of the feelings Maisy had been pushing down deep inside of her roar up to the surface like a tsunami after an oceanic plate shift. The group was sitting inside the hidden room, and it was the last meeting that Perry would be attending as she was leaving for school in a few days.
Maisy and Ryder hadn’t spoken about Perry, Mr. Hargraves’s barn, or anything else, opting to spend each evening in each other’s arms working on their nonverbal communication instead. Maisy noticed there was a desperation to their lovemaking, as if they were trying to savor every second together to make it last in their memories when they parted, or maybe it was an attempt to satiate their longing for each other to purge the desire for each other once and for all. Either way, it wasn’t working. She knew that it would take a lifetime and forever for her to get enough of Ryder.
The group took turns, sharing their latest good deeds, while they ate chocolate cake, because it was Perry’s favorite. When it was Perry’s turn, she glanced up from George, who was stretched out in her lap. At a little over two months old, he was so much bigger than when they had found him and yet he was still small enough to be picked up with one hand. His ears sto
od up now and his face had more angles, which were accentuated by the dark stripes on his forehead and around his eyes. His fur was the softest Maisy had ever felt and even his paws, which, like the tip of his tail, were black, were soft to the touch. He was an amazingly gentle kitten, rarely using his claws. She wondered if they had failed him there. What if he got outside by accident? How would he defend himself if he didn’t know how to use his claws? She made a mental note to ask Hannah about that.
“I got up extra early one morning and cleaned out the stables for Uncle Quino,” Perry said. Her voice wavered a bit, and Maisy felt her throat get tight. “I haven’t had much time to do anything else because I’ve been packing.”
A sob halted whatever she’d been about to say, and Savannah reached over and patted her back. “It’s okay, hon. I think you’re pretty amazing to have cleaned those stables. I’ve seen what Daisy can do when she puts her mind to it.”
This caused Perry to snort-laugh, and Maisy was grateful to her friend because, honestly, she was going to miss this kid so much, she was having a hard time forming the words to tell her without bawling her eyes out.
“Anyway, I made these for everyone,” Perry said. She reached into her pocket and pulled out several string bracelets. “You have all meant so much to me this summer, I wanted to give you something to remember me by.”
Jeri examined the colorful friendship band with a tiny silver charm in the shape of a cat’s silhouette dangling from it. Then she slipped it on and adjusted the length. She turned it in the light and said, “It’s lovely. I am honored to wear it.”
Perry’s tears were flowing freely now and she scrubbed at her face with one hand. Her voice was tight when she said, “I thought they could signify membership in the Royal Order of George.”
Perry held up her own wrist and Maisy saw she was wearing a matching bracelet. She slipped hers on as did Savannah. They stacked their hands together in the middle of the circle so that they could see all of their bracelets. Maisy looked across at Perry, who was holding George in one arm, and said, “No matter where you go, you’re one of us, and we’ll be here for you when you need us.”
“Without question,” Jeri added.
“Always,” Savannah said.
“Thank you,” Perry said. Then she burst into great big hiccupping sobs. She held George up to her face and sobbed into his fur. The kitten looked alarmed for a moment, but then settled into Perry’s hands as if he knew she just needed to get it out. “I don’t know how I’m going to leave George. I love him so much. And then there’s Cooper, and all of you, and my best friend, Jasmine. I don’t want to leave. I feel like I’m going to die.”
The last of her words ended in a wail and this time George did leap from her arms. He strutted over to his bed and climbed in, where he began to preen the tears off his fur. Perry buried her face in her hands and cried in earnest. The other women looked at her and Maisy nodded. She knew it was up to her to talk to Perry, since she was seeing her dad and all. Savy and Jeri hugged Perry and then slipped upstairs to leave them alone to talk.
Maisy grabbed a tissue out of a nearby box and handed it to Perry. She used it to dry her face and blow her nose. When she looked at Maisy, she said, “Well, I sure know how to end a party, don’t I? Be sure to call me if ever your guests stay too long.”
Maisy laughed and then put one arm around the teen and hugged her close. “Aw, kid, I’m going to miss you.”
“I’ll miss you, too,” Perry said. “I feel like my life is this runaway train and I can’t do anything to slow it down or stop it.”
“Your dad isn’t budging about Saint Mary’s, huh?” Maisy asked. She had suspected as much, but given that she and Ryder hadn’t been talking, it needed confirmation.
“No,” Perry said. “You saw him that night at the police station. He is immovable about this. He will do anything, sacrifice everything, even you, if it means I get the opportunities he thinks are so important. How can I fight that?”
“Can your mom talk to him for you?” Maisy asked.
“She tried,” Perry said. She shook her head. “No luck.”
“I’m sorry, Perry,” Maisy said. “I wish I could do something.”
“Me, too,” Perry said. “But I don’t think anyone can help me. It’ll break my dad’s heart if I refuse to go to Saint Mary’s and I love him so much, I just can’t do that.”
Perry started to cry again. As if sensing he was needed, George came out of his fish shaped bed and climbed into her lap. He started to knead her sweatshirt, making kitty biscuits, trying to soothe his pal.
Maisy sat with the two of them for a while. It was a wrenching moment to listen to Perry say good-bye to the kitten she had helped save. As long as she lived, Maisy knew she’d never forget hearing Perry tell George all the things she felt he needed to know to grow up to be a good cat.
“Don’t go off into the woods or you’ll be bear food,” she said. She rubbed the tears off her face with her sleeve. “Always try to keep the litter in the box. It’s rude if you don’t. Don’t chew the books. While it’s lovely of you to catch any rodents or bugs, they do not need to be presented to anyone in the middle of the night, just leave them by the back door to be found in the morning.”
Maisy was laughing and crying as Perry went through her list. When she was finished, Maisy asked her if she wanted to have some alone time with George, and Perry nodded. Walking away from the girl with their rescue kitten made Maisy’s heart hurt in ways she didn’t expect, because she had never felt this sort of loss before. In fact, other than losing Auntie El, she’d never experienced any sort of loss before.
It was then that it hit her. What a life of loss did to a person. It made them not trust in the good and the happy. It made them suspicious and ever watchful that it could all be yanked away at any moment. Ryder had lived a life like that. First the death of his mother, then the absentee alcoholism of his father, then his brother took off for parts unknown when Ryder found himself with a wife and baby, and then the wife, who wanted to have a chance to pursue her own dreams, left, too.
And now he was sending his daughter away to the fanciest school in the world. He didn’t have to. It was clearly not Perry’s choice. So why was he doing it? The answer was so obvious, Maisy thought she would literally stub her toe when she tripped over it. Anticipating the greatest loss of his life, Ryder was maintaining control of his pain by orchestrating the loss himself. If he sent Perry away to the best school, he could make a preemptive strike against the hurt of having his girl grow up and leave.
Well, to hell with that noise, Maisy thought. She stomped through the house, her temper gathering steam like storm clouds on the horizon. By the time she made it out the door to the front porch, where she knew Ryder would be waiting for her, she was practically frothing at the mouth.
She banged out of the house like she was the FBI on the trail of one of their most wanted. Ryder turned at the noise and she had one second to appreciate the beauty that was her man, sitting on the porch rail with this hat tipped over his brow, the moonlight above casting shadows over the sculpted shape of his body. He was breathtaking and for one second she soaked it in. Then she let him have it.
“You!” she said. “I want to have a word with you.”
“Maisy? Are you all right?” he asked. He stood up as if he was going to hug her. “You sound upset.”
“You bet I’m upset,” she said. She held up a hand to ward him off. “I just had an epiphany about you, this, us, and I’ve got some things to say.”
Ryder sat back down on the rail, taking off his hat and tossing it onto a nearby chair. If Maisy could have described his expression, it would have been “shocked with a dash of admiration and a pinch of humor.”
“This whole thing is a mess,” she said.
“Which thing are we talking about?” he asked.
“Us,” she said.
“Phew, for a second I thought you were talking about the renovation,” he said.
“No, the house is amazing,” she said. “Especially the turret.” She didn’t look at him when she said it, because she didn’t want to remember their nights there together right now. “But we’re not okay, not even close.”
“Agreed,” he said. His voice was so soft she barely heard him and this made her even angrier.
“Why?” she asked. She put her hands on her hips and jutted out her chin. “You show me in a million little ways that you love me, but you can’t say it. Why?” His eyebrows went up and she knew exactly what he was thinking. “No, you can’t escape this conversation. We’re having it and we’re having it right now.”
“You seem a bit irate,” he said. He rose to his feet again. “Maybe if you take a few deep breaths, you’ll—”
“I’m not irate!” Maisy snapped. She rolled into her professor persona, making her voice frosty enough to grow icicles. “I’m pitching a hissy fit and it’s my first real one, so kindly do not interrupt me.”
Ryder sat back down—again.
“You arrived in my life, wearing a cowboy hat, looking like every woman’s fantasy of the perfect guy, and then you were kind, funny, smart, and loving. And I realized you were the one and that I actually want to be with you today, tomorrow, always.”
“Maisy, I think—”
“Hush.” Maisy held up her hand. “Here’s the thing. I love you. You know this. How do you know this? Because I’ve told you I’m in love with you. But you’ve never said it to me, not once, and you’re leaving.” She began to pace the porch, waving her arms while she worked through her ire. “So, here, I finally think I’ve found one of the good ones, my soul mate, but he’s beating feet to git. What am I supposed to do with that? Buck up and have the long-distance relationship I don’t want, when he can’t even tell me how he feels about me?”